Well, folks, if you remember the pandemic season, Celtic’s recent performances might have you reaching for a Covid test. I mean, we’ve all heard of ‘long Covid’, but this is getting ridiculous. It’s like the ghost of the 2020 season has come back to haunt us, and it’s wearing a Scott Bain jersey!
Speaking of Bain, his howler at Easter Road was something to behold. I haven’t seen a drop that bad since my mate tried to juggle his pint after six rounds at the pub. It was a moment that had us all cringing. Our performances against Hibs, St Mirren and The Rangers have been that bad, I hear Neil Lennon has booked a flight to Dubai.
And then there was Bernabei, doing his best impression of a Celtic player. It was like watching a bad cosplay at a comic convention. You know the type, the guy who shows up in a Batman suit from the discount store and thinks he’s Christian Bale. Only in this case, Bernabei was wearing green and white, and the only thing he was saving was Hibernian’s European hopes.
As for Ralston, well, he seemed to be doing the opposite of evolving. If Pokemon could devolve, that’s what we witnessed. He was less Pikachu turning into Raichu, more Raichu turning into… well, a rat. I joke. But Ralston is playing like someone who hasn’t had a lot of game time this season.
I don’t think we should too downhearted. Yes, our squad depth looks about as shallow as a kiddie pool, and yes, some of our benchwarmers seem more interested in keeping the seats toasty than actually playing football. I expect the club and Ange will address weak links in the summer. It’s better to find out now than at the beginning of next season. But let’s remember, we’re the champions. We’ve got the league cup in the bag, and the Scottish Cup is within our grasp. We’re on the verge of a treble, and that’s no small feat.
So, what’s next? Well, it looks like we’ve got a busy summer ahead. We’ll need to bolster the squad if we’re going to compete in Europe and domestically. But for now, let’s forget about the last three games. Consider them wiped from the memory bank.
Trophy day on Saturday will be our Men in Black moment. You know, when they use that little device to make you forget everything? It’s a chance to celebrate, to forget the past three weeks and focus on the cup final.
Our games after the title has been won might have been poor, but in the famous words of Dwayne ‘The Rock’ Johnson, ‘It doesn’t matter!’.
See you all at Trongate on Saturday!
As for the party in Trongate. Forget that, go to a empty park or industrial estate (or The Celtic way).
As no one stays there or near to it. Nothing wrong with a celebration or three. But some folks still have to sleep. And drive to other places of interest. Like their work.
Yae I’m Buzz O’ Killington.
I’m nearly 52 life is annoying but watching celtic win lose or draw helps me through this annoying life, never take for granted things you don’t have, always look on the bright side of life.