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Yes, you heard it here first, a 1000 year prediction. Based on the reliable and scientific football manager game. If it’s good enough for Sky Sports News then Celts Are Here will have a piece of the action.

Sky Sports allegedly used the database from Football Manager to pretend to know attributes of young and new players. If your going to use this database for your information than why not jump 1000 years into the future, yes someone has played 1000 seasons of Football Manager. I think I managed about 25 seasons before but the threat of divorce and the hairy fungal elbows I developed forced me into cold turkey and about 3 weeks of serious withdrawal.

The withdrawals got so bad I used to go asleep pretending I was getting interviewed after managing Celtic to their 5th consecutive Champions League Title. I’d developed a split personality just like them two Rangers goalkeepers.

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But 1000 seasons, WOW.

Unfortunately the hermit involved in the study focused on England but Celtic popped up in the all time records with with over a staggering 576,199 Tims making trips to Celtic Park. We here Peter Lawwell is investing on all his money in Cryonics so he can be thawed out in 3010.

Sky Sports may know something the rest of us don’t or maybe they are just a bunch of lazy idiots. This 1000 year study makes Sheffield United the most prolific team in the history of the sport so maybe the stats should be taking with a grain of salt. Also the fact that Celtic Park has a maximum capacity of 75,000 there must be a glitch in the system, but don’t tell Peter.

If you’re in work reading this and trying to do anything but work, you can view this quality piece of quantitive research HERE.

 

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